Let’s face it: it’s been a rough road for lesbians and media representation. We all have our own ways of dealing when the stories we love let us down. Personally, one of my coping strategies is to gather up all the stories that ended well for lesbian TV couples and hold them close I’ve been imagining, with my friends, the lives that some of our favorite lesbian and bi women characters lead after happily ever after. It started with my personal headcanon for Margot Verger and Alana Bloom from Hannibal and sort of grew from there.
So here are my hopes and dreams for what happened in the fictional happily ever after.
Margot and Alana, Hannibal
You guys remember the Secret Island of Tropical Fingerbanging from Scandal? Well, Margot used her horrible parents’ fortune to buy that island for herself and her family. She and Alana wear sarongs always and raise their son to be a kind, gentle vegetarian. Every night, they remind each other how lucky they are to have found one another, and fall asleep together in a hammock listening to the sound of the surf.
Brittany and Santana, Glee
Brittany and Santana move to New York and rent a tiny apartment together. Brittany gets a Ph.D. in math from NYU. Santana has a successful off-broadway career, and eventually lands a spot in the ensemble of Hamilton. In their thirties, they move back to Ohio, where Brittany becomes a professor at a liberal arts college, and they have all sorts of kids together. They sing their kids to sleep with lullabies they wrote themselves, and every Thursday night, they go to open mic night at the local bar where they sing “Danny’s Song” together and mean every word of it.
The fictional world of The Wire exists very close to our own. Pretty much right on top of our own, in fact. Which is to say that life is always going to be complicated and difficult for Kima Greggs. Nonetheless, she continues to do everything she can to make the complicated, difficult world of Baltimore a slightly better place. She is on good terms with her ex-wife Cheryl. They share custody of Cheryl’s son Elijah, who eventually starts to call Kima “Mom.” Kima has a long, successful career as a murder detective, although she never gets the promotions she deserves due to institutionalized and bureaucratic bullshit. She eventually meets and falls in love with a female beat cop, and they move in together. She meets up with Lester and McNulty for drinks sometimes.
Mel and Linds settle comfortably into life in Toronto together. Melanie opens her own law practice; Lindsey becomes somewhat successful as an artist. At this point in time, their son Gus is applying to art school in the US, and their daughter JR is going through a rebellious phase. She rides Melanie’s old motorcycle and got a labrys tattooed on her shoulder. One night, JR comes in late, and Melanie scolds her before sending her to bed. After JR stomps off and slams her door, Lindsey smiles and wraps her arms around Mel. She says that even though JR is driving them crazy right now, she’s gonna turn out just fine. Mel asks how Lindsey knows. Lindsey smiles and says, “Because she’s a lot like you.”
Let’s face it: Tina and Bette probably needed a lot of therapy after living through the final season of The L Word. Nonetheless, they move to New York together. Tina works as a movie producer; Bette opens a new gallery. They become part of a new group of lesbian friends who get up to fewer shenanigans than the WeHo crowd. They make enough money to rent a place with a view of Central Park and eventually send Angelica to the Constance Billard School for Girls. Kit visits sometimes and they laugh about all the nonsense their old friends in WeHo are getting up to.